Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I'm really busy with my period
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