ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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