there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
