Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Oh god it's open bar.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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