I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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