kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
wow bdsm is so cute
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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