No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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