Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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