let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Randomize
