I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i just google imaged poop.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
