Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
