Nicole vs. Life
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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