I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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