She went from zero to smokin in five shots
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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