no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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