We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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