i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
