Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I don't deserve a penis
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
