It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
