why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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