question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize
