They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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