Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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