you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
