She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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