Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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