nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
