just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
where are you?
Hypothermia
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
