super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
