lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
