Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
