He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
