I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
