i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
