Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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