i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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