You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
