moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
