a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize