areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
