i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I fill condoms, not promises.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
