Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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