Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
