i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
