I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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