Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
