Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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