my sisters under your porch take her home
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
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