Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
