The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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